marriage nowadays is a choice

Marriage is a topic that is always brought up. Ever since we were kids it’s something that we’ve seen in countless shows and movies.

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The idea of finding our soulmate and starting a new life together is something that’s desirable to lớn many. If you’re not working towards reaching the goal of marriage, it’s looked down upon by older generations. I come from a Mexican family, and every time I find myself visiting Mexico, I get asked about my dating status without fail. The idea of having or needing a partner is something that’s so sánh ingrained in culture and society that our generation has diminished this mindset a bit.

There used to lớn be this mix expectation to lớn get married at a certain age and have the wedding of your dreams. Or, some people mix a self-placed “holder” for the age you want to lớn get married at. Nowadays, it isn’t being pushed as much by society and by our generation and older millennials, too. 

The value of self-worth in our 20s should always be there. Instead of being concerned about building a family at a young age, shifting your focus to lớn a career or on yourself is just as good.

For example, Emma Watson is normalizing independence by having a relationship with yourself first, even as you start entering your thirties. 

Some people don’t care about all the career milestones she’s accomplished, and only choose to lớn show disbelief that she isn’t married with kids at almost 30. There was judgment and mockery around her being single for a reason or that no one would want her if she waits too long, which is exactly the problem. The main point that was pulled out of the interview was her marital/dating status rather than vãn her career accomplishments. 

Being single shouldn’t be looked down upon. There shouldn’t be a fear in that or a need to lớn seek out companionship because there’s more to lớn life than vãn just that.

There shouldn’t be a rush to lớn get married because not everyone is equipped for it. From a young age, it’s been ingrained in our minds to lớn have kids and pass down your legacy so sánh it can live on. Personally, I have a fear of bringing children into such a harsh world as this.

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Some people I used to lớn know in high school have already gotten married and it’s made mạ question my choices. I worry that once I graduate from UNT that I’ll immediately be expected to lớn get married and have kids.

It’s important to lớn learn about yourself and find the value of inner worth without needing to lớn rely on someone else to lớn tự that for you or to lớn grant you the happiness you can’t even give yourself. We’ve seen parents divorce, stay together or have a toxic relationship. Those toxic traits that we learned from them can latch on to lớn us. If your parents were as toxic as mine were, you might not even know what a healthy relationship is supposed to lớn look or be lượt thích which makes things even harder. 

It’s no wonder younger people are careful and don’t want a bad foundation for their kids if we choose to lớn have them. We realize that whoever we choose to lớn marry will also affect our kids, so sánh we have to lớn be wise about it. It’s a big decision to lớn make and we’re either avoiding it, living our lives or being overly cautious about it.

It’s more beneficial to lớn settle down at an older age rather than vãn earlier. There’s more knowledge about ourselves and our relationships with other people. Just because my mom got married in her early 20s doesn’t mean I have to lớn tự the same. 

Our focus as a generation has shifted more towards academics and having a good career. These things are more important for the generation we are currently living in. There isn’t a need to lớn settle for just anyone. Some people move from relationship to lớn relationship which can lead to lớn trust issues and other emotional scars that need healing which then requires time. For others, dating seems exhausting, and there’s the notion that floats around that love doesn’t exist in this day and age anymore.

We’re all getting our lives figured out dealing with education, jobs student loans and financial stability and I, as well as many others, will be saving marriage for last or for whenever it feels lượt thích the right time.

Featured Illustration: Kylie Phillips

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